The “gain of loss” is a beautiful contradiction. It’s been almost one year since I experienced the loss of my mother. Even though her passing was not sudden and was not a surprise, I wasn’t prepared for the void her death left in my life. That void wasn’t created because I no longer had to care for her. It wasn’t created because I had time on my hands. It was created because she was gone. The many hours of caregiving provided countless opportunities to learn more about her, to grow closer to her and to share my love with her. Those were active, physically engaging moments that moved from the “doing” category to the “remembering” category upon her death.
I lost my mother, but in the end I gained the enduring gift of human companionship and compassion. Her death taught me a lot. Her life taught me more.